A Quiet Shade of Blue

A Quiet Shade of Blue - a novel by John Wu

RAISTLIN Connor smiled. He was standing in his private office overlooking the main dance floor, packed wall to wall with the rich and beautiful. In just a few short weeks since the grand opening, Studio B had become the premiere club for the elite in the city of Chicago. This was his baby, and Rase was a proud father.
Nevermind the rumors in the press about his uncertain background and the questionable backings of unknown financiers. In the end, it just served to heighten the interest of the public. Those who had known him before knew that the story wasn't so glamorous, but even they wondered how he always managed to beat the system.
A club owner at twenty-five, who would've guessed? Rase had started out his life as just another middle-class boy in the suburbs. He looked out through the one-way mirror at his successful venture, and his thoughts drifted to childhood memories.
A freshly mowed lawn, a two-car garage, and a time when the most exciting thing in the world was chasing down the ice cream truck with a dollar in your hand. But even in his youth, Rase dreamed of someday owning that truck, being the one who was chased after, the one who had what everyone wanted. All they had to do was hand over half their allowance. Not unlike the line that waited outside tonight.
But success always comes with a price, and Rase knew he had paid it many times over. There were two things he never had enough of: time and money. To achieve his vision, he had often traded his time for the promise of future money, working long hours to develop a base of strong business relationships while his friends were out partying.
Time had become a scarce commodity for Rase, and this affected other areas of his life more than he cared to admit. His career and business aspirations had always come first, some would even say he was married to his dreams. That only meant that the few relationships he became involved in were almost like marital affairs. It was never an intentional or premeditated act of emotional betrayal, but that didn't mean the pain was any less.
So each time Rase found himself distracted, confused, attracted, or simply becoming too used to having someone around, he took a step back and reset his priorities. He reset his way of thinking, and added another brick to the wall that kept him safe and focused on his dreams. Though sometimes he wondered if his dreams would change someday. After all, it's not like he wanted to be a fireman anymore.
But it scared him to think that he might someday dream of a freshly mowed lawn, a two-car garage, and a couple of rugrats running down the street to catch the ice cream truck. So with a conscious push he turned his attention time and time again to the problems at hand. Most of which had to do with money.
And on that fateful day just over a year ago, all his waiting and planning had finally come to a head when the opportunity presented itself. The only unexpected hurdle had been the tiny detail of morality, but that was easily overcome. A month later, the construction crew had begun work breaking the ground for the future site of Studio B, and tonight he stood proudly as the undisputed king of the Chicago nightlife scene.
It's not like he was a rags to riches story. On the contrary Rase knew that he had lived a rather spoiled life compared to many. But success is often measured not in absolute terms, but in relative terms. And for Rase, that meant that his sense of accomplishment would not be found through a college education, a corporate job, and a gold watch for his retirement at sixty-five. What others saw as an exciting future, Rase simply viewed as a life sentence laid out by society.
Instead, Rase was driven by his own measures of success, inner demons that taunted him to take risk, to not settle, to turn the doubters into believers. Not by argument but by proof. To believe so strongly in something that it becomes reality. If a psychosomatic illness could make a person sick through mind and body, then who's to say the mind couldn't be powerful in positive ways as well.
As a child, Rase was a dreamer, and many would say he still is. They say growing up is hard to do, but then you can't really stop it either. But what you can do is find a way to make your own path through it. When Rase figured that out, he took it as his life's motto. Carpe diem, I will beat them all, even if it takes a lifetime. And many times Rase had wondered which life he would choose if given the choice between reality and the blissful ignorance of a comatose fantasy.

Thump thump thump thump boom chicka boom thump boom chicka boom. The stomping beat was infectious, urging even the onlookers and wallflowers to bob their heads to the rhythm.
Caitlin Nyzer slipped through the crowd easily with a tray full of drinks held high above her head. She shifted carefully to the side as one of the patrons stumbled back towards her, the effects of a long night taking its toll in two ounce increments.
Cate had been working at Studio B since the opening just a few weeks ago, and she loved her job. It was a drastic change of pace for the young Caitlin that had grown up the only daughter of Dr. and Mrs. Nyzer, respected community members and overprotective parents.
She knew what it was like to party with the elite, but she had learned the proper etiquette as a young child, greeting guests formally and then staying out of the way. In effect, she had learned nothing about the real world.
So it didn't surprise many of her friends when one day she picked up and left. It was the summer after college, and she had fallen head over heels for a young and charismatic hot shot attorney named Vance Reyal who drove a Harley and took her along for the ride.
And away they rode from Chicago to Santa Monica, with only a brief stop in Las Vegas where the knight in shining armor pulled over and produced a sparkling ring from the inside pocket of his worn leather jacket. They found the perfect beach house condo, and Cate felt at last that she was free from the rules and restrictions of her upbringing.
But the dream was soon interrupted by reality as the economy hit hard, Vance's job disappeared and mortgages were due. Cate had never worked a day in her life, and didn't know how to even start. The once supportive though protective parents who had turned their backs on their daughter had become the last and final option.
What was expected to be an impossible battle became an inspiring moment. Cate flew home with the last of her savings while husband Vance held down the fort and searched desperately for another job. The Nyzer family reunion was anything but a battle. Cate's parents had long been overly cautious with their only daughter, but now that there was a second chance, they seized it with everything they had. With Cate back on her feet and the bonds with her family stronger than ever, it seemed like the dream had just begun.
But dreams are for the future, and happily ever after only happens in fairy tales. A marriage built on a summer fling and a trip to Vegas was shaky ground to build on.
It was the little things at first that caught her attention. He was always out working on new cases, but for a lawyer who appeared to be highly in demand, there never seemed to be enough money to pay the bills. Cate had never been one to manage finances and her parents kept them happy as long as they got to see their daughter regularly. But she started to wonder as the extended business trips became more frequent and her own life grew restless.
She didn't remember anymore if it was out of suspicion or pure boredom that she followed him one day on a lonely drive through Santa Monica. She told herself that she merely wanted to see where he worked, and then afterwards she would head to the local mall to indulge herself. But his destination was not an office building, a courthouse, or the city hall.
Instead, she found herself parked at the end of a residential block, watching him step out of his car and walk through a gate to a simple but well-kept house. The trees in the neighborhood were trimmed and Cate knew the high value of the real estate in this area. A luxury class BMW rested idly in the open garage. The smooth pavement of the road was perfectly constructed and litter-free. This was the kind of place Cate imagined her parents living in. She paused for a moment and made a note to herself to suggest it to them. Maybe even stubborn old Dad would give in to a place like this, and they could move out here and be together more often. Cate imagined the wealthy clients inside the home who would be a valuable source of income for her and her husband.
What came next was a blur. A woman, much older than Cate, walking out of the house with Vance. His arm around her, a pause at the car, a hug, a kiss, the rest was inconsequential. The car driving off as Cate sat stunned but somehow not as surprised as she felt she should be as all the clues converged at once to a single conclusion.
She wanted to kill him, to yell at him, to make him pay, to teach him a lesson, to leave him. But she could do none of those things. Her heart wouldn't let her. So she went back home.
Days passed, then weeks. Then one day she went back to the simple house on the clean street in the perfect neighborhood, and rang the doorbell.
The same woman answered the door and spoke immediately.
"Uhm, I'm not interested, thank you."
As the door began to close, Cate caught herself and interrupted quickly.
"Wait, I'm not here to sell you anything. I just want to ask you a question."
"Well my husband and I are both church-going people, so you don't have to worry about us."
"Oh... is your husband... home?"
"No, what is it exactly you're looking for?"
"I'm just an old friend, that's all."
"Oh I see, well my husband's away on business most of the time, he's a salesman so he has to travel a lot."
Cate didn't know what else to say, so she just said it.
"Look, I know about you and Vance, and I think you should know who I am."
The woman squinted and then smiled with recognition.
"Oh wait a minute! You're a friend of Vance?"
Cate paused, but the woman quickly continued.
"You must be Cathy! My husband's mentioned you many times, whenever he goes to the hospital to visit you. I'm so glad you're okay now, you look great!"
Cate suddenly felt sick.
"Your husband is... Vance?"
The woman beamed.
"Well yes, we're newlyweds! He's always so busy so we haven't even had a chance to go on a real honeymoon, but I respect how much dedication he has for his work. I've heard about you before, I'm so glad I finally got the chance to meet you! Won't you come in?"
Cate couldn't think of anything to say, so she just turned and ran. As she reached the gate, she heard the woman calling out, "Oh dear! It's okay! I know about your social anxiety, come back!"
There was nothing left to do or say. Vance came home just before five o'clock, early for once. Cate was packing. Vance put his arms around her and she quickly pulled away.
"What's up babe? Whatcha doin?"
"I'm going home."
"Oh, visit the folks eh, say hi for me. Hey, I might have to go on another business trip soon for a new client, so call my cell if you need to reach me."
"I met the other woman, Vance."
"Hm? Who?"
"The other--your wife! Your other wife! In the nice little house with the perfect trees! I followed you! I met her! She called me sick and insane!"
Cate was stumbling over her words but she couldn't contain herself anymore. She couldn't believe Vance was smiling. He began laughing.
"You're a smart one, Caitlin Nyzer. I was betting on you figuring it out sooner or later. The other women, they're all old fools, I'll be long gone before they have any clue. But you, you really caught my eye. 'Course I wouldn't have bothered keeping you around for a whole year if it weren't for your parents and their oh-so-generous contributions to the Vance Reyal fund."
Cate couldn't believe there was still more to this twisted dream. At this point, nothing would surprise her.
"So... there are other women?"
"Sure, more than I can remember. Though I never work on more than two at the same time. Gets complicated ya know. C'mon now Cate, you were the naive spoiled little rich girl. If you think about it, I'm teaching you a lesson in real life. Here in the real world, it's live and let die."
"And this condo?"
"Paid off in full now by your lovely parents. Of course the papers are all in my name, and my buddy in Vegas took care of things there so I can tell you now, you don't get half."
The proud grin on Vance's face was sickening. Cate closed her half-packed suitcase and headed for the door. Vance walked her to the door casually like he had done this a million times before, maybe because he had.
"Can I take my own car at least?"
"Sure babe, keep that as a souvenir of good times. Don't worry, I'm sure mom and pop will help you get back on your feet in no time."
"To tell you the truth Vance, I could care less about the money. I was in it for the love."
"Yeah well, love don't make the world go 'round babe, money does."
With that, Cate drove off down the street. In the rearview mirror, she could see Vance pulling out a wooden sign from the trunk of his car and planting it on the lawn. The sign read "For sale by owner". Cate sped towards the airport, but pulled off the highway to make one important stop.

The other woman's name was Lynn. When Cate first told her everything that had happened, she tried to deny it.
"It can't be true! My Vance, he could never do that!"
But Lynn wasn't completely naive. She had seen her share of clues just as Cate had. Together they understood the whole story of Vance Reyal. The long business trips, the unpaid bills, the missing pieces were all filled in. Lynn spoke with a stern resolve.
"He doesn't know who he's messing with. My brother used to work for the FBI. We're going to get him locked away for the rest of his life."
"I'm sorry, Lynn, but I really don't care about Vance anymore, certainly not enough to spend months in court. You know he'll drag it out endlessly."
"I don't care, I'm going to get him."
"Well, I'll help in any way I can, but I'm going home to Chicago. I'm going to start a new life on my own, and for once I'm going to rely on myself and no one else."
"I respect that, and I wish you the best. We'll keep in touch."
Lynn gave Cate a long hug, and Cate felt almost like she had gained another family member. Lynn was roughly the same age as Cate's mother, and the embrace was warm and comforting. They exchanged phone numbers and Lynn walked Cate to the front door.
As Cate drove away from the now familiar house on the perfect street, she felt a tingle in the back of her neck. It was that strange feeling after a scary movie or a bad memory that made you worry for no reason. She paused at a stop sign and something made her turn around and look into the back seat.
To see an actual person sitting in the back was more than enough to make Cate jump. At first, she almost let out a sigh of relief when she realized it was Vance. But the knife in his hand and the look on his face quickly changed her instincts from anger to fear, then panic.
The first slash dug deep into her forearm as she somehow managed to block the attack meant for her heart. After that, she couldn't remember what happened. Her arms flailed wildly, and her feet stomped on the gas pedal. She remembered hearing the menacing tone of his voice.
"You had to go and ruin things didn't you! You couldn't just walk away! You brought this on yourself!"
The next thing she remembered was a huge wall of blue metal barreling towards them from the left. Blinding lights, a deafening screech, and a man looking down at them through a large glass window. Above him in big letters it read, "NOT IN SERVICE".
Cate had woken up later in a hospital bed. The doctors told her she was lucky, she had some deep lacerations to her right forearm, but no other serious injuries. She was released later that day and was on a flight to Chicago by evening. That night Cate had a tearful reunion with her parents. She told them it hadn't worked out with Vance, but nothing more. They were happy enough to have her back. Dad pulled out his wallet and Mom rushed into the kitchen to make Caitlin's favorite food. It wasn't easy, but after a month of rest and recuperation, Cate told her parents that she was determined to make it on her own. She found a simple apartment in the suburbs near her parents and began applying for jobs. When the opportunity at Studio B came up, Cate jumped at it. For once in her life, Caitlin Nyzer was independent, self-reliant, and committed to building her own dream one step at a time.

With his arms crossed and a smile on his face, Raistlin Connor turned his attention to the present. His lifelong fantasy of success had become reality. No one could deny his wealth, power or respect in this city. The first thought was natural, to expand beyond Chicago to the midwest, then the coasts, then the world. To build an empire, to make millions into billions, to turn an influence over many into power over any.
But Rase had never dreamed of being the President, a king, or a dictator. He had often wondered if power would corrupt one's soul to want more of it, to never have enough. In many ways, it was still his main focus and priority, but sometimes other people come into your life when you least expect it.
Like the girl he was watching below, slipping through the crowd on the main floor with a tray of drinks. She was his employee, and nothing more at this point. A man of Rase's position and power had endless women throwing themselves at him for the promise of money and maybe even love. But this girl was different.
They had met under different circumstances, in a small rented office with bare walls and makeshift carpeting covering only half the floor. No one knew who Rase was yet. Looking back, he realized the anonymity had a comfortable feeling to it, something he missed these days.
She had walked in through the simple glass door, and as usual the door didn't shut properly so she had turned to pull it closed. Something about the way she pivoted on her heels made her hair sweep across her shoulders as if she were moving in slow motion. Rase was captivated from the get-go.
But his priorities were stronger than ever at that time, and he quickly reset himself mentally and stepped forward to meet the potential new employee. The first words from her were not as uplifting as her movements.
"Hi, I'm Cate, can you go get the boss, I'm here for an interview."
Rase wasn't sure what to say, as he looked down at his wrinkled shirt and his best pair of khakis. So he made up something.
"Well, uh, actually the boss isn't here right now, but he wanted me to get your information and he'll look at it later. Here's an application form. It's all the typical stuff, just list your past experience and skills."
Now it was Cate who was looking down uncomfortably.
"Well I don't really have a lot of experience... but I can tell you I'll be great at this job, I'll never be late to work, and I'll do whatever is needed."
There was more, but Rase's attention had drifted from her words to other things. He realized that he was completely transfixed by her, but he couldn't tell if it was her figure, style, or personality. She was like one of those girls that all the other girls hated because the guys loved her but they couldn't say why. "She's not all that," they would say. Their male friends always had the most frustrating reply.
"There's just something about her..."

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